(no subject)

[deckardcanine]

Months ago, I ate at the Italian restaurant Dino and observed a bizarre item in the cheese section of the menu. I took pictures with my phone, but they didn't come out well. Fortunately, I see the same item here. It reads thus:

Guffanti Provolone Mandarino 2 Anni {cow - raw, sharp!} Valpadana 5
80 pound balls, cave aged two years till sharp & tangy with a melt in your mouth texture

Eighty pounds?! That can't be right, but what do they mean?? Even eight ounces is an awful lot for one ball. (For readers more familiar with the metric system, 80 lbs = about 36 kg and 8 oz = about 227 g, which is larger than most large burgers.)

The unintended humor goes even further, of course, if you have a Beavisian mindset.

Comments

[marmoe.livejournal.com]

Depends on the type of cheese. I could not find appropriate info on Guffanti, however 36kg / 80 lbs sounds about right for a loaf of cheese.

[ccdesan.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's how Guffanti comes. Parmegiano often comes in 60-lb wheels, but of course you don't get all that on your linguini!

[jordan179.livejournal.com]

Obviously this is a dinner item intended for large theropods.

[deckardcanine.livejournal.com]

But for one item?! Unless that's how much you get for only $5, why should we care how much there was originally?

[deckardcanine.livejournal.com]

I thought reptiles had no interest in dairy products, since they don't nurse. Then again, a newer theory holds that dinosaurs were more mammal-like than we thought....

[marmoe.livejournal.com]

You'll get a helping of the cheese, not the whole wheel. In restaurants they also tend to tell you where the complete cow lived, not just your individual steak. ;-)

[deckardcanine.livejournal.com]

I see. They charge you for the extra information, just as many restaurants charge for extra adjectives on the menu.

[marmoe.livejournal.com]

Waiter: "Sir, how did you find the steak?" Guest: "Very well, it was hidden right beneath the pea." :twisted:

(I think I had to bend the English language a bit for this joke, it works well in German.)

More seriously, though, those high prizes are not always a rip-off; money truly can buy you a different class of taste for nominally the same product, if spent right.