Tuesday, 2 October 2012 02:39 pm
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deckardcanineA while back in this journal, I listed a bunch of mostly famous video game titles that are at least pretty bad when you think about 'em. This time I'll focus on movies, but these titles aren't necessarily stupid or dull; they're questionable, as in "Why do you suppose the makers did that?" The 2010 The Karate Kid may have been about kung fu, but its remake status makes the reason obvious, so that’s not on my list. I'm more quizzical about the following dozen:
Blade Runner. Between length and plot differences, I don't blame Ridley Scott for rejecting "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?" for his adaptation of the book. I do blame him for taking the title of an unrelated story and applying it to characters whose job is to destroy renegade androids, generally via guns. Does one of the various cuts include an in-story explanation?
The Bourne Ultimatum. OK, I haven't watched it yet, but a critic tells me there is no ultimatum or threat thereof. At any rate, it must not be central. Perhaps the studio just wanted a big word that suggested finality.
Fanny and Alexander. You could easily summarize the plot without bringing up Fanny. What business does she have getting top billing?
Half Nelson. No literal wrestling. No discussion of wrestling. Nobody named Nelson.
Island of Lost Souls. It's strange enough that The Island of Dr. Moreau seemed to need a new title, but I would hardly think to call animals "lost souls" just because they've been modified and raised for human qualities, however grotesquely.
The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp. Michael Powell and Emeric Pressburger may have been oddly innovative with their quotation marks in 'I Know Where I'm Going!', and they may have made an honest mistake with 49th Parallel (which takes place elsewhere on the Canada-U.S. border), but I can only conclude that the title of TLaDoCB is a deliberate deception on their part. No character calls Clive Candy "Blimp," and he spends far more time as a general and at lower ranks than colonel. I could forgive that much in light of his similarity to the prototypical Colonel Blimp, but why lengthen the title with "and Death" when he's still healthy, honored, and not mistaken for dead in the end? If the story weren't so good, I'd want a refund.
The Man from Earth. Nobody leaves Earth, meets any ETs, studies astronomy, or talks about anything of the sort. Why not mention something actually distinctive about the protagonist, like, oh, I don't know, his purported 14,000-year lifespan?
The Phantom Menace. For all the complaints spoken against this movie, I have yet to hear anyone else ask what the titular menace is without my prompting. Unlike some other entries in the series, it includes plenty of menaces but no literal ghosts. Should we think of the Dark Side of the Force? Anakin's personal looming villainy? Or the many disagreeable decisions of George Lucas?
Reservoir Dogs. Well, the criminals are dogs in an unfortunate slang sense, and the warehouse might be associated with a reservoir, but that's not important. After this, it's hardly a surprise that the same auteur used Black Mask as a working title for Pulp Fiction, despite a complete lack of black masks.
10 Things I Hate About You. The closest we get to relevance is Kat's untitled poem, which lists 14 things.
Three Kings. One soldier briefly sings, "We three kings be stealin' the gold." While they are indeed planning to steal Iraqi gold, further context makes his song no less random, and his comrades show no acknowledgment. It's February; he should have carols out of his head by now. Does everything involving three guys in a Middle Eastern desert evoke the Magi?
Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Those are two characters plus the main city they visit. No regard for grammar or for characters at least as important as Cristina.
If you know the rationales, by all means, enlighten me. If you can come up with more examples, that's welcome too.
Blade Runner. Between length and plot differences, I don't blame Ridley Scott for rejecting "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?" for his adaptation of the book. I do blame him for taking the title of an unrelated story and applying it to characters whose job is to destroy renegade androids, generally via guns. Does one of the various cuts include an in-story explanation?
The Bourne Ultimatum. OK, I haven't watched it yet, but a critic tells me there is no ultimatum or threat thereof. At any rate, it must not be central. Perhaps the studio just wanted a big word that suggested finality.
Fanny and Alexander. You could easily summarize the plot without bringing up Fanny. What business does she have getting top billing?
Half Nelson. No literal wrestling. No discussion of wrestling. Nobody named Nelson.
Island of Lost Souls. It's strange enough that The Island of Dr. Moreau seemed to need a new title, but I would hardly think to call animals "lost souls" just because they've been modified and raised for human qualities, however grotesquely.
The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp. Michael Powell and Emeric Pressburger may have been oddly innovative with their quotation marks in 'I Know Where I'm Going!', and they may have made an honest mistake with 49th Parallel (which takes place elsewhere on the Canada-U.S. border), but I can only conclude that the title of TLaDoCB is a deliberate deception on their part. No character calls Clive Candy "Blimp," and he spends far more time as a general and at lower ranks than colonel. I could forgive that much in light of his similarity to the prototypical Colonel Blimp, but why lengthen the title with "and Death" when he's still healthy, honored, and not mistaken for dead in the end? If the story weren't so good, I'd want a refund.
The Man from Earth. Nobody leaves Earth, meets any ETs, studies astronomy, or talks about anything of the sort. Why not mention something actually distinctive about the protagonist, like, oh, I don't know, his purported 14,000-year lifespan?
The Phantom Menace. For all the complaints spoken against this movie, I have yet to hear anyone else ask what the titular menace is without my prompting. Unlike some other entries in the series, it includes plenty of menaces but no literal ghosts. Should we think of the Dark Side of the Force? Anakin's personal looming villainy? Or the many disagreeable decisions of George Lucas?
Reservoir Dogs. Well, the criminals are dogs in an unfortunate slang sense, and the warehouse might be associated with a reservoir, but that's not important. After this, it's hardly a surprise that the same auteur used Black Mask as a working title for Pulp Fiction, despite a complete lack of black masks.
10 Things I Hate About You. The closest we get to relevance is Kat's untitled poem, which lists 14 things.
Three Kings. One soldier briefly sings, "We three kings be stealin' the gold." While they are indeed planning to steal Iraqi gold, further context makes his song no less random, and his comrades show no acknowledgment. It's February; he should have carols out of his head by now. Does everything involving three guys in a Middle Eastern desert evoke the Magi?
Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Those are two characters plus the main city they visit. No regard for grammar or for characters at least as important as Cristina.
If you know the rationales, by all means, enlighten me. If you can come up with more examples, that's welcome too.
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I can't speak for the other films, being unfamiliar with them.
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Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein. I can't think of any other comedians whose names entered the titles of movies where they didn't go by those names. I single out this particular entry because "Frankenstein" (actually just the monster, but I'll give that a pass) probably should not have been the main attraction. Dracula and the Wolfman have just as much screen time, and unlike the other monster, they get played by their best-known actors. Heck, the Wolfman had had the most recent Warner Bros. outing to my knowledge.