Tuesday, 28 December 2004 06:25 pm
A meme less ordinary
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deckardcanineLess ordinary than the first in my LJ, anyway. My most manifestly kooky LJ friend, the Kinky Turtle, offered to ask every posting individual five surreal questions, to which they were to give surreal answers in their own LJs. Here's what I got:
1. What is the terrible secret of space?
2. How did you discover the terrible secret of space?
3. Are there stairs in your house?
4. What would happen to me if I learned the terrible secret of space?
5. How are you planning to stop me from learning the terrible secret of space?
At first I was a little disappointed: they looked kinda ordinary next to many others. But on further reflection, it wouldn't be as much fun if the questions were so outrageous that no answer could do them justice, would it? So here are my responses:
1. None of it is empty. Even the so-called vacuums are filled with what I affectionately call little green men, who supervise the universe on behalf of such agencies as the Intergalactic Illuminati and Kris Kringle.
2. Two of the little green men in a Tequila bottle were sotted enough to let down their guard and not leave the human visual spectrum when I put my binoculars over them.
3. If you're so inactive that you need stairs, then you have no place in the upper floors of my house. That's where my family keeps the training bots running 24/7.
4. You would gradually turn into one of the little green men and be enslaved to the will of Those Who Demand Supervision, unless either (a) you had my level of charisma to talk them out of it in exchange for your frequent flyer miles, or (b) someone like me made you forget the secret before the next half moon.
5. Curse you and your charisma for getting me to tell you! Exit strategies are out of vogue, but I guess I should...hm...of course! Keep your eye on the time shown in the corner of your screen. Any second now, it will change *instantaneously,* so don't blink. Ready...there! My emissaries have penetrated your eyeballs and are working their way into your hippocampus. You will remember none of this, and if you look here again, you will see an enticing story of aikido agoutis instead.
I can't hope to top the turkle, but I think I did well for the short time I spent thinking it out.
1. What is the terrible secret of space?
2. How did you discover the terrible secret of space?
3. Are there stairs in your house?
4. What would happen to me if I learned the terrible secret of space?
5. How are you planning to stop me from learning the terrible secret of space?
At first I was a little disappointed: they looked kinda ordinary next to many others. But on further reflection, it wouldn't be as much fun if the questions were so outrageous that no answer could do them justice, would it? So here are my responses:
1. None of it is empty. Even the so-called vacuums are filled with what I affectionately call little green men, who supervise the universe on behalf of such agencies as the Intergalactic Illuminati and Kris Kringle.
2. Two of the little green men in a Tequila bottle were sotted enough to let down their guard and not leave the human visual spectrum when I put my binoculars over them.
3. If you're so inactive that you need stairs, then you have no place in the upper floors of my house. That's where my family keeps the training bots running 24/7.
4. You would gradually turn into one of the little green men and be enslaved to the will of Those Who Demand Supervision, unless either (a) you had my level of charisma to talk them out of it in exchange for your frequent flyer miles, or (b) someone like me made you forget the secret before the next half moon.
5. Curse you and your charisma for getting me to tell you! Exit strategies are out of vogue, but I guess I should...hm...of course! Keep your eye on the time shown in the corner of your screen. Any second now, it will change *instantaneously,* so don't blink. Ready...there! My emissaries have penetrated your eyeballs and are working their way into your hippocampus. You will remember none of this, and if you look here again, you will see an enticing story of aikido agoutis instead.
I can't hope to top the turkle, but I think I did well for the short time I spent thinking it out.
Well you posted it, now put up!
Re: Well you posted it, now put up!
2. Do coworkers make fun of you for not having a tail?
3. When did you decide to remove your kosher recipe tattoos?
4. How do you plan to give the Red Sea a tie-dye pattern?
5. Do you have any comment on Ted Kennedy’s recent statement that you would make an excellent limo driver?